Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Friday, June 26, 2009
BEING A MOM CHANGED ME A LOT!
"I made a great many resolutions when my children were born. Some were vague, if heartfelt: I'll take good care of you; I will keep you safe. Some were specific: I'll never hit you, I will always make you look good and presentable to others, etc..etc... It was a momentous turning point, the birth of my children , filled with Joy and emotion. It was a date to remember forever. And so, of course, it was a time for resolutions.
I really don't believe in resolutions, because my wisdom thought me that no one can change me. If I'd like to change something, I will do it on my own free will. I usually change if there is really something happen to me and teach me new about life. Marking resolutions is just a fake, fancy things to think about. And yes, I have accumulated quite a pile of failed and repeated resolutions . But I keep making them and I wouldn't want to give up the practice. It suggests that change for the better really is possible and that today could be the first day of a new, improved me or maybe tomorrow.
Having a child was different. Becoming someone's mother meant that my role in the world had changed -- I wasn't just the same old me trying to be a new, improved version. I was a mother, really and truly and forever, and the question was, what kind of person, what kind of mother, would be reflected in my child's eyes?
At first, I wanted an orderly home, to be organized, I grew up and live in a were clothes was never been folded and put up in a cabinet, dishes that never been washed until its about time to eat again, like mats and pillow in our small bedroom. Even my bags and other stuff in my work place is a huge mess, honestly. If there's is one things that i would say I am really organized too, is how to handle my budget. I wanted desperately to outgrow my bad habits into good one. When my twins was born more things change, moving to one place to another, scheduled renovations on our house and turning nights into days. I wanted to give something for my kids w/c I know I never been had before. keeping what we did have perfectly happen... Thanks for my ever supportive husband in financial matters. Our bedroom turned into a baby room and later turned into play room, because the mess got worse and worse, as the baby things mixed in with our books and our piles of papers.
My attempts to to become one of the advocates of breastfeeding mother's failed because I cannot give my baby's enough milk than they need, because they are two. I tried so much, my doctor said I could take one tablet of one particular medicine to produce more milk but instead, I take two. But nevertheless my milk started to loose after as I started my work, this is a resolution that only gets more complicated and competitive as time goes on.
I have made this "healthy-food-only allowed-in-the-table" resolution so many times that I may be in the running for a lifetime achievement award. And still, I don't have much time to cook or maybe I don't like to cook. Unfortunately, I am a home economics teacher but if there is one thing I am not good enough is to cook different dishes-- a terrible revelation thing to accept. Good to know that my husband accept this kind of reality. As they say "they way to your mans heart is though his stomach" some little part of me believes it but don't accept it..there's must be other way... like lungs... just kidding.
Even more important, I wanted my children to think I'm good enough. And not just a good mother, but that I'm honest and hard working and somehow a honorable and that the world is better off for my being in it (is just in my dreams). Set a good example as to do the usual things -- if someone gives me too much change, I return the extra money. I give more to charity than I used to, and I talk with my kids about where I want my money to go, and why.
It's easy to laugh at parents who suddenly acquire new virtues as their children grow: the people who never particularly cared about the homeless before, for example, but are now busy doing parent-child food drives. Or how about all those nonreligious parents who find themselves joining up because the child should be raised in religious school?
But want kind of kids I would like to raise?! Do I want them to become smart and be the first in everything, do I like them to become famous, or rich. Most parents would always say during their kids first birthday that they would wish that they will become healthy, good boy, god fearing and loving person. It's easy to giggle, easy to warn that children are disconcertingly good at seeing right through their parents; you have to do the thing sincerely, or you might as well not bother.
Most parents are doing the things to make them more admirable to their kids, setting a good example, but do we really sincere? I can generally put my self and my child through some charitable paces in order to get involved at early age and put in the kids diary of milestone. Mothers do it because she is quite genuinely interested in becoming that more involved, more charitable person yourself -- and bringing your child along with you. And it's not just that you want your child to admire you -- there's something about motherhood that brings out the desire to actually be admirable.
Having children and being their mother has changed who I really am. I used to think that the moral here was that I tried to be a better person when my children were born but that I'm still the same old ' less than perfect 'me. This is true, in a way, but it's not the whole truth: I'm not good either, when I was a student, I failed in math subjects, I dont know but even how hard I try, its really difficult to do it unlike others what if my kids will be like that, will I get mad or shout to my kids till they shy to death?! Will I do the same thing that other parents do, like talk at first and later arguing with my kids teachers and keep saying that they are the one to be blame off instead of me. Parents like me are tying to give most of their time to their kids to keep them safe at all times, a typical type of mother that when the kids fell down on the ground , we're here to catch and get them up... but somehow, I realize that most of the time I wanted to keep my kids in safe and for not to be blamed for any causes or accidents they might get into it, I want to teach my kids to be more independent as possible as can be knows how to handle and decide for them selves.
I eventually I realized that I don't want to be the kind of person who takes advantage of someone's mistake by setting a good examples to my kids . Yes it true that "best teacher is our experiences" So I let my kids create their own experience to be their teacher. I will not be always there when you fall , because that will teach you how to get up. When somethings wrong happen, I will not be the one to correct it, you must feel that pain of the wrong things you decide and choose to do. Please do ask for help... because I will not be here forever. I will just watch you fall and get up because you have your life of you own.
Its hard for me to give because Nobody gives me before. Yes maybe I selfish with a bad manner kind of attitude. I believe to have somethings you have to earn it on your way. There nothing free in this world, I don't give to charity just so I can tell my children that I give money because that is a good thing to do and see by the other people, though I'm not above pointing out charitable morals. They say when you give, don't ask. Honestly speaking, In my work place its hard for to give monetary contribution if it is for our superiors because I believe they have more than what I have. , most of the time when I give to charity, I'm thinking about other mothers and their children, about people who are sick or in danger or scared, and I'm identifying in a direct and personal way that comes out of my experience as a mother.
I feel more in common with people in very different circumstances, and I feel more obliged to try to help. It was probably foolish to try to change myself by the force of resolution, on the other hand, the experience of child rearing has brought a powerful day-by-day desire to do right by my children, and also to help shape the world into a good place for them to live their lives.
I didn't succeed in making myself over for their sakes, but perhaps they made me over a little bit for all our sakes. That may be, in the end, a better story and a more hopeful result for my kids in the future."
Posted by: grace, wife of Rolly and mother of Amir and Ace
Posted by Grace , wife to Rolly; mother to Amir & Ace at 6:02 AM 0 comments
Thursday, June 11, 2009
ABELLA TWINS CELEBRATIONS OF LIFE
One candle on your cake;
Proud parents stare in wonder
At each new move both of you make.
As this special date arrives,
For babies has brought pleasure
Into all our lives.
How both of you progress and grow,
From the cute and tiny infants
You were one year ago.
Enjoy your presents, too.
The reason for this day
Is a special persons--both of you!
On your birthday,
I’m thinking about how much light and sparkle
you freely dispense wherever you go,
how your sunny smile lights up any gathering.
Every birthday marks another year
of you radiating positive, happy energy,
contagious happiness
that infects all who come in contact with you.
May your next birthday find you the same--
glowing from within,
beaming bright joy on everyone you meet.
I feel blessed to know you.
Posted by Grace , wife to Rolly; mother to Amir & Ace at 10:22 AM 0 comments
Labels: CELEBRATIONS, POEMS
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
I ASKED GOD.....
All heaven went to work that day and mend a perfect mold
The cherubs giggled from what they saw
That sweetest little face came from above
Angels all applause as everything took place
All wanted more so they made another mold
I don't know why and I don't know how....
Do we really deserve this blessing from Above?
God is good, God is great!
Who I am dare to ask,....
because is there anything for me to ask?
Posted by Grace , wife to Rolly; mother to Amir & Ace at 3:34 PM 0 comments
Monday, June 8, 2009
ABELLA TWINS- COMPILATION GUIDE TO POTTY TRAINING
You can probably begin potty training if he:
- Knows words for urine, stool, and toilet
- Is somewhat bothered by feeling wet or soiled
- Shows interest in using the potty (he's open to sitting on it or curious about bathrooms)
- Has an awareness of when he's about to urinate or have a bowel movement
- Your child may say "poop" and "pee-pee," show some desire to be changed, and even be enchanted by the potty (but blithely make puddles everywhere when his diaper's off). Ultimately, knowing whether your child's ready comes down to guesswork. If it turns out he isn't, you can simply try again after a few weeks or months.
Signs of readiness can include:
Showing discomfort when wearing a dirty diaper
Choosing a particular area to have a bowel movement
Staying dry for at least two hours straight
Showing an interest in or asking questions about the bathroom
Wanting to sit on the toilet
Toilet-training infants has become a recent trend, but it really isn't until toddler hood that kids can take an active part in training. "Elimination Communication" is actually more about helping parents understand when a baby needs to go than helping a child go on his own.
Are you ready?
5 Ways to Know Your Child Is Ready
Are diaper-free days just around the corner? Most kids show an interest in the potty sometime between the ages of 2 and 3. It's time to give toilet training a try if your child displays two or more of the following signs, says Diane Stafford, coauthor of Potty Training for Dummies.
She's interested in watching you use the toilet and helping you flush.
He's uncomfortable in dirty diapers and wants them changed.
She regularly has dry diapers in the morning or stays dry during naps.
He lets you know when he needs to use the potty.
She begins to develop a predictable peeing and pooping schedule.
5 Facts From the Pros
Here's some expert advice to keep in mind.
Girls typically show an interest in using the potty at 23 months, and boys do so at 25 months.
Being in day care or having a working mom has no negative impact on potty training.
Children learning to use the toilet may move quickly from stage to stage (for example, peeing in the potty, then pooping there, then staying dry all night), or they may linger at any given stage for months and still be well within the norm.
Spanking or disciplining your child after accidents can lead to power struggles and is not an effective way to potty train.
Girls are normally fully trained by 33 months old and boys by 37 months.
Source: The Medical College of Wisconsin, Mil
Top potty-training strategies
The process may seem simple: Buy potty, introduce potty to child, have child sit on it clothed, then unclothed, buy fun underwear, be patient and upbeat. But potty training is not a one-diaper-fits-all process. Learning to tailor your potty-training strategy to your child's temperament - and your family's - will save you a lot of stress in the long run.
The HUG AND KISSES Approach :
The cold-turkey underwear approach:
No-mess disposable-training pants approach:
The get-with-the-program approach:
The sticker-chart approach:
The he-gets-in-when-ready approach:
4 Potty-Training Pitfalls and How to Deal
Pediatrician Mark Wolraich, M.D., editor of American Academy of Pediatrics Guide to Toilet Training, gives advice on overcoming some common stumbling blocks.
Pitfall: My child will use the potty but refuses to flush.
Solution: Most kids go through a developmental stage when they don't like to see a "part of themselves" disappear, so they resist having their bowel movements flushed down the toilet, Dr. Wolraich explains. "That's probably what's
happening—but don't make a big deal of it." The fix here is simply to remain patient. This too shall pass, and your toddler will be flushing in no time.Pitfall: We've had accidents in the car, but we don't know whether we should put her in diapers for outings.
Solution: Switching back and forth between diapers, disposables, and underwear is confusing for a child. Keep it
consistent at home, at day care, and on outings. When you head out with a toddler who is still learning to use the toilet, keep a portable potty in the back of your car; that way, you can always make an emergency stop if necessary. And don't forget to take her to the bathroom as soon as you reach your destination and once more just before you head home.Pitfall: My son has been using the potty for about a month, but now he's saying that he wants to go back to diapers.
Solution: Take a good look at what's happening in your household. Because potty training is one of the last developmental skills that 2- to 3-year-olds master, it's often one of the first that regresses when something such as a new sibling disrupts the child's routine, Dr. Wolraich says. If your tot is having accidents on a consistent basis, use diapers for a while until he's ready to try again. Many kids take a few steps backward, but that doesn't stop them from reaching their goals.
Pitfall: My daughter will pee in the toilet but won't poop there.
Solution: "You need to watch the situation closely," advises Dr. Wolraich. Your child could be constipated, or maybe she was constipated within the last few weeks. If it hurt her to go to the bathroom that time, she'll probably be scared or reluctant to go again. If the problem persists, talk to her pediatrician.
2 Things to Say (And 2 Not to Say) After an Accident
Say This: "It's okay. Accidents happen!" Encourage your tot by letting him know that "mistakes" are perfectly normal and acceptable, and that everyone has them.
Don't Say This: "I told you that we don't go potty in our pants anymore!" Since he just pooped or peed in his pants, this statement isn't helpful.
Say This: "Let's clean up. Someday you'll go in the toilet!" Here, you're reinforcing the idea that she will succeed at using the potty eventually—and that's something she really needs to hear, especially after an accident.
Don't Say This: "You're too big to wet your pants!" You can see (and probably smell) the unmistakable evidence that she's not too big to miss the potty boat. These words will shame and embarrass your child rather than empower or encourage her.
Why he may be wetting the bed and how to put an end to it.
By age 3 or 4, most children are able to sleep through the night without wetting the bed. But 5 to 7 million children -- mostly boys -- older than age 6 are not able to stay dry. Bed-wetting can be exhausting and upsetting for the whole family. The good news is that it usually does not signal an emotional or physical problem. Most children outgrow the tendency by puberty.
Causes
Nighttime bed-wetting (nocturnal enuresis) usually occurs because the child's bladder is not yet large enough to hold a full night's output of urine, or because he has not yet developed the urge to wake up in response to a full bladder.
Studies also show that children who wet the bed may have an abnormally low level of an antidiuretic hormone (ADH). This hormone helps the kidneys retain water, reducing the amount of urine filling the bladder. This tendency is often associated with a family history of bed-wetting.
Treatment
Bed-wetting is not something that's in your child's control, so punishment for wet nights and rewards for dry nights are not helpful or appropriate. Children are usually embarrassed by this problem, so it's unlikely that your child would be wetting the bed on purpose. Reassure him that he's not the only one with this problem -- there are probably other kids in his class who also wet the bed.
Discourage him from drinking large amounts of fluids before bed, especially caffeinated sodas. However, don't be too rigid. If he's genuinely thirsty, let him have a drink.
Have him go to the bathroom right before he goes to bed.
Wake him up to use the bathroom before you go to bed.
If these methods don't work, your pediatrician may recommend a bed-wetting alarm. With this device, a lightweight alarm (worn near the shoulder) is attached to a sensor that clips on the child's underwear. A buzzer sounds at the first drop of urine. Over time, children learn to sense the need to wake up on their own, so they don't wet the bed.
As a last resort, your pediatrician may recommend DDAVP, a synthetic antidiuretic hormone, which is a prescription medication. It's available as tablets and as a nasal spray.
Actually, even after your child is a potty pro, expect that there will be a few accidents. Until he's 3 and hasn't had an accident for six months, he's not officially potty trained. It may take a few false starts, but eventually, one strategy or another will click with your child, and you'll both say goodbye to the diapers. Hoping I would be able to use this for my twins.... wish me luck!
Posted by Grace , wife to Rolly; mother to Amir & Ace at 1:45 PM 0 comments
Labels: POTTY TRAINING
Sunday, June 7, 2009
BABYS BED TIME STORIES :
Why? this is definitely a "NO-NO" for me to buy and if you also have a twin baby are thinking of buying two sets of crib w/ pillows. Neither I have one kid, I wouldn't actually buy this same kind of resting place for my baby, aside from the fact that this is looks like a prisoners cage (because of the lined wall) this can be only be used for a short period of time and cost you more. I always thinking why people used to buy this kid of thing for their kids, isn't because for their child's convenience or for their own?! Stylish, yes-correct! but If I have budget for this I would look forward to renovate their room into their playpen, big enough and safe for them to move around. For those small place in their house it is not convenient to use. Alright, you can actually fold it, but the reason why you buy it is because you like to use it most of the time?
Another reason is during hot season, its difficult to leave your kids sleeping in a cushion where heat can easily transfer to baby's body cause for them to perspire a lot. Without even knowing there back body is wet. Another thing is the bedding and tons of flat sheets that you have to maintain everyday.
there are also some cases that your kids can already reach to get out from the crib, before you knew your precious baby is already fallen.
Traditional "DUYAN"?
Score: ***
Why? Duyan is made from native material known as " rattan" and can bought actually for almost 90 pesos; add the cost of the durable rope and the a hook, we can say you actually need at least less than 500pesos will bought in Divisoria (Phils.) As my Mama said "There's no better way that the duyan way" I actually have to most convenient time having this duyan around the house, aside from the fact that it is easier to maintain, the bedding w/c known as "banig" gives that natural cool feeling to my baby. Though it is also can be use for short period of time, at least you didn't loose your money for nothing and later on another problem is getting rid of those expensive things you bought for your baby, some kind of " hard to throw and hard to give" mentality person.
It is much easier cradle my baby specially if you sing them a a lullaby song. It actually give me a chance to sing that no one contradict (because of my voice LOL=) But what actually you need is a bigger space enough for the duyan to move freely and do not bounce and hit to your wall or your baby's might get hurt inside. But for those mothers who are more of style, you might not like this in the beginning but nevertheless it much comfortable, one of the quality we are looking for our baby's, right?!
AMIR & ACE ABELLA
3 Way Baby Stroller?
Score :*****
Why? It is said 3 way, of convenience: it can slide, bounce up and down; a rack and steady cradle for only 2400+++ pesos (2007). It can be bought in a less cheaper price compared to crib but expensive compared to duyan. It is most convenience for those who have small spaces in the house where everything is in one particular place. If they are awake you could actually play w/ them much closer while rolling the stroller on the floor, play peekaboo or else. If they are trying to get sleep cradle them quietly by slowly moving the stroller up and downward, I remember the chair so called "tumba-tumba" of our Lola Ina, she used to sit in that chair for relaxation, there are times I also want to play w/ the chair I actually asked her to get me some milk for her to get off the chair and before she knew it I am already sited on her chair, silly isn't.
Since my baby is not used to sit properly, I just move the front wheels for the strolle to be like their little chair, this is also can be done if it is already their feeding time. The only problem on it is there is a minimum body weight for this equipment if your baby is too have, you cannot bounce upside and downward the stroller because it could cause minor head injury for your baby. You don't want that to happen, right. For busy mom's like me my main point is for hygienically purpose I just don't just jump else where and place everywhere my baby in the different parts of the house like sofa or worst the floor. No pre- preparation required when even you baby wants to sleep.
Posted by Grace , wife to Rolly; mother to Amir & Ace at 8:33 AM 0 comments
Labels: CRIB, DUYAN STROLLER